Gay Couple Visiting India

[Rob Holden]

Hello everyone,

Me and my partner are planning a visit to India some time end of Feb or beginning of March but before we finalize anything we want to make sure that we wont get into trouble being a gay couple in India. I have been to many countries where homosexuality is illegal but is socially not frowned upon and Ive been told India is one of such countries where being Gay is not gonna get us killed so just looking for first hand information from openly gay couples in India or tourists who have been there and their experiences.

I am especially concerned about sharing the same room and how the hotel staff would take two males in the same room.

I hope I can get some useful feedback.

Thanks
Rob

 

[Gori Bride]

Hi Rob,

I am not speaking from experience because I am a female and I am not gay so please take that into consideration. I have seen guys holding hands all over India and no one raises an eyebrow but holding hands does not necessarily mean that those guys are gay, holding hands is perfectly normal in rural settings but if you are at an urban center people would get the idea that you are gay and no one is going to throw stones at you for that but if you mean showing affection at a public place then it is a big no no even for straight couples leave alone a gay pair.

I see guys staying together at hotels in the same room all the time but they are not necessarily gay and front desk really wont make anything out of two guys sharing the same room. As long as you are not openly gay I dont see why there would be a problem.

I would suggest waiting to hear from some one who has been in a similar situation instead of taking my word for it.

 

[Chahal]

Homosexuality is illegal in India but as long as you keep it private, it is nobody's business. Public display of affection is not a good idea for a gay couple anywhere in India.

 

[briannagodess]

Hi and welcome to the forum!

Like others have said, homosexuality is illegal in India. But since you are a tourist, I think you would be left alone. As long as you don't practice public displays of attention, then you are fine. Tourism is definitely a major industry in India and you would be treated differently from the other locals.

And finally, even the media itself has started incorporating homosexuality in television shows and even movies. So beyond the anti-gay law, you really don't have much to worry about. Just make sure to be discreet in public so you won't be noticed much as a couple.

I know of a few gay-friendly hotels as well. I don't know where you're staying but I'd share some with you:

• Cap's Corner in Baga Road
• Siolim House in Goa
• Umaid Mahal in Jaipur
• Durag Niwas Guest House in Jodhpur
• Drifter's Inn in Manali

So there you go... If you'd like, you can also opt to just book a room in advance so you won't have any problem during your stay in the hotel or even getting a hotel for you and your partner.

Good luck!

 

[cecejailer]

Hey, I have no experience with this but I think it's not an issue as long as you don't come out (no pun intended) too strong. Just keep it casual if you don't want anything bad to happen and I think you both will be okay. I've read that homosexuality is not that unaccepted in India as we're taught it is, not in the last few years at least.

 

[ladydaydream]

Hi there. Homosexuality is unfortunately illegal in India and is frowned upon heavily, but I think as long as you avoid PDA (public displays of affection) you should be totally fine. Two men holding hands isn't a big deal either, so I think just avoid kissing or explicitly stating that either of you are gay. Things are rapidly changing in India though, so hopefully in the future this shouldn't be as much of an issue. I hope you and your partner are able to have a lovely time in India despite it. Cheers!

 

[GammaRay]

You guys will be fine in highly urbanized parts of India but I'd be a bit concerned in rural areas where prejudice still happens to this day. I suppose avoiding PDA is a good idea but atleast when it's just the two of you somewhere private then it's ok.

 

[cecejailer]

Hi there. Homosexuality is unfortunately illegal in India and is frowned upon heavily, but I think as long as you avoid PDA (public displays of affection) you should be totally fine. Two men holding hands isn't a big deal either, so I think just avoid kissing or explicitly stating that either of you are gay. Things are rapidly changing in India though, so hopefully in the future this shouldn't be as much of an issue. I hope you and your partner are able to have a lovely time in India despite it. Cheers!

Wow I didn't know homosexuality was illegal in India... That's so sad. Is it illegal in a way that you can even be arrested for it? If that's the case I suggest OP to really avoid public affection of any kind, because you never know... It makes me so sad that some parts of the world won't even allow you to travel and have fun with your partner simply because they like the same sex.

 

[ladydaydream]

Wow I didn't know homosexuality was illegal in India... That's so sad. Is it illegal in a way that you can even be arrested for it? If that's the case I suggest OP to really avoid public affection of any kind, because you never know... It makes me so sad that some parts of the world won't even allow you to travel and have fun with your partner simply because they like the same sex.

I've heard that generally people leave tourists alone about this kind of thing, but that rural areas can still be troublesome and there might be some legal repercussions in that situation. It really is so sad, and I hope that in the future things might change, since discrimination on this front is really so unnecessary and unkind!

 

[Normad]

I also think that if you stick to the highly urbanized areas of India then you and your partner will be fine. A lot is changing all around the world with regards to gay and lesbian people, but there are others who have a long way to go until they reach the acceptance stage. So to avoid any problems, I think you and your partner should just avoid showing any kind of affection in public and not tell anyone that you are gay, and you will be ok.

 

[MissT]

The more urban areas are a little more accepting of the gay lifestyle as long as you stay away from kissing and holding each other in public. The people in the less urban areas are not as accepting and I think the advice that you got about staying in the more urbanized areas is really good and worth considering. All in all, I think that it might be in your best interests not to divulge to anyone that you are a couple while you are there.

 

[art_and_yoga]

As the other posters have mentioned, you will probably be safest if you stay in the urban areas. Mumbai and Bangalore have LGBT film festivals. Delhi and Kolkatta are noted for their pride festivals. Pune has a strong LGBT activist scene.

Yes, India does have some very vocal people who take things to the extreme. Remember that India has over a billion people of all different types who work and live together peacefully everyday. Historically, India has a strong history of pushing social justice issues. Mahatma Gandhi comes to mind.

Keep your phone charged and at hand. Any small extra international fee is worth paying. Just pulling out my phone while in my own American town has averted some potential situations. People know that they can be quickly video taped or reported. Dialing 112 will reach all of India's emergency services.

Have you considered going with a travel company that caters to LGBT clients? They might be able to assist in all your details so that your trip is as hassle free as possible.

 

[melanie]

Interesting topic. I often wonder how gay couples experiences are cross-culturally. I hope your trip is a pleasant one, free of snafus. If homosexuality in India is, in fact, illegal. Perhaps you can be traveling as "brothers" and maintain that façade anywhere in public. That's a shame. Best of luck and I hope you have fun on your trip!